Day 41 of cleanse… was the last day – a few days ago. I’ve come off this one the most smooth of all times I’ve ever cleansed. Truly the cleanse is usually not the most difficult part for me – its coming off it with ease, grace, and self-care. For the last 7 days of the cleanse I kept with lots of green juice, lemon water, and other pulp free liquids, while adding in raw soups, a little pate, and some days a few bites of salad. This transition was key in preparing my digestive system for solid food.
I still didn’t feel hungry in these days or have a desire for food. I lost track of what number day I was on – significant of it not mattering – and my mind being so very at peace, and surrendered to the voice of my body’s true need and desire. For those 41 days, no longer did my mind dominate my body and call the shots, yet it easefully yielded to the deeper innate needs of my biochemistry and the magic of clearing and rebooting that continues even now in a more subtle way (that’s not to say it wasn’t incredibly intense at times as old stuff passed through). On day 41, my body distinctly let me know that it wanted food, or I needed to slow way down and go even deeper. Given that I’m in the midst of preparing for one of my biggest events of the year – as much as I would like to continue – it just wasn’t the time to go completely inward, and no longer work.
Neither having a preference for continuing or stopping, yet only a priority and commitment to listen to my body, I took heed and broke my fast on a small raw pizza and salad… with each bit I chewed well, ate slowly, and continued to listen – feeling my digestive system kick into another gear as nutrition pumped through my body… feeling so much gratitude. In an instant I could feel my body growing physically stronger, and feeling so very powerful like I could climb a mountain. My amazing and great assistant Yuliana and I were on a big shopping trip in Denpasar (the capital city here in Bali) – for our upcoming retreat – and I was driving in full-on traffic for the first time. For an American like myself, driving on the opposite side of the road, and the opposite side of the car in a standard was not without it’s opportunity for extra heightened awareness. Its NOT at all like driving in the organized and ordered American I come from with people every where, motor bikes at all angles, really bad roads with lots of holes and narrow lanes. After eating, driving for 50 meters, I could already feel my mind taking over and taking charge – I became more aggressive, less sensitive to other drivers, and in general began feeling quite fast. Ah – the voice inside was still very audible and present. “Slow down and integrate your mental clarity with your physical strength”, said the voice within, “oh, says my personality, right – ok.” So feeling my mind incredibly clear, sharp and sensitive – combined with my new found physical strength, I eased off the gas and impetus to race forward, took a deep breath, tuned into myself and surroundings, laughed at myself with Yuliana… and continued with more awareness and depth… learning to balance the power of my mind and body together as a whole.
Since breaking the fast, I continue to detox at a much milder rate as I integrate the big shift I’ve just experienced. I’m still observing what that is as I do feel different and changed – what it is exactly is still yet to be experienced and felt into… I know slowing way down is a big part of that. What I do know is that I not only feel physically the best ever and in excellent shape – I also feel a continued calm and lightness emotionally that remains ever present no matter the busyness and storms that pass through. And I also feel a natural resolve to hold a higher space when confronted with conflict… this is a relieve since I sure feel better loving uncontrived and unconditionally – rather than engaging where it isn’t growing.
Thank you for reading and your reflections along the way. Its been an amazing journey that continues – and I’m so very thankful to share with you along the way. And if you’d like to come detox with us at the end of the month, check out my upcoming retreat: https://amyrachelle.com/
